La Moretta

How True

“Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future.” -- Niels Bohr

Top 6 places I'd like to visit

Madagascar

Cuba

Taos

Alaska

The Dakotas

Ethiopia

I am the worst vegetarian ever. Yesterday I made turnip soup with the vegetables provided by the CSA, only to find out that they were actually rutabagas.

40,000 men and women everyday

I had a business trip last Friday which was actually a lot of fun in a strange way. However, the idiots at the airport were a bunch of wheezing, sneezing, sniffling, non-mouth covering losers. It reminded me of one of the early scenes in The Stand.

Now I am sick and very crabby indeed, with Blue Oyster Cult stuck in a loop in my head.

However, I will fight it off.

Starts with C

There is a gigantic Cookie Monster leaning over the top of the Google logo today, as a tribute to Sesame Street's 40th anniversary. I was staring at it while trying to come up with a search strategy for a client project, and all of a sudden I remembered one of my favorite toys -- a cookie monster puppet.  It was a brilliant blue plush (very vibrant against the 70s neutral decor). His eyes made a faint, tinny, rattling noise when you shook his head. His mouth was some sort of hard material covered with fabric, but you could put things in his mouth and he would eat them via a small hole at the back of his mouth.

I loved that puppet. I still love puppets. As a matter of fact one time at a pet adoption show we were trying to deal with some out of control huskies and I used a golden retriever puppet to get them to calm down. The golden retriever puppet told jokes like "What is a husky's favorite drink? Whine!" and then laughed heartily at his own joke. The huskies were fascinated, and they are a tough audience.

Well, there you go. A vibrant memory from childhood out of nowhere. Hopefully I can move on now that I've put it out in the ether.

Gingerella Fitzgerald, August 1998 - June 14, 2009

 

Ginger lolling about in her favorite chair.

 

 

 

I love you Ginger. I hope you get better.

Thank you!

I'm closing up this blog. It has run its course. It has been a wonderful year. Thanks so much for reading and for your advice, support and jokes. It's very possible that I'll start up another blog at some point, and if so, I'll put the information on this blog.

Idea Rat: Motor Mouth

I have been trying to consistently maintain a certain standard of appearance when I go out these days. My everyday standard is quite low -- clothes, deodorant, shoes, unbrushed hair pulled into bun and I'm outta there. (When I meet up with friends I'll wear makeup and brush hair.)

Recently, though, I've been trying to up my game a bit. That means brushing hair, consistently applying sunscreen, freshly brushing teeth and putting on some jewelry even if I'm just running to the store. However, this takes a bit more time, which I don't like. The electric toothbrush takes two minutes, and unfortunately I can't multitask while I'm using it.

So here's my idea:

The motor mouth(tm) -- it's a customized mold (like the trays used for bleaching, except for the full mouth) that you put in your mouth and it brushes your teeth and tongue while you go about your business. It would self-customize -- no need to go to a dentist.

Well, I'm off to the patent office.

 

Photo source: Four Eyes Joke Shop

Anyone know a good intellectual property lawyer?

I'm reeling from what I just read in Variety. 

David R. Ellis has been tapped to direct “Humpty Dumpty.”

The 3-D sci-fi horror pic is about a half-human, half-alien creature who embarks on a murderous rampage after his alien mother is abused by two rednecks in the Deep South.

This is my idea! 

http://www.variety.com/article/VR1118002878.html?categoryid=13&cs=1

Above: Bwa ha ha ha!